body positivity

Growing Up:A Story About Makeup

Makeup has meant a lot of different things for me since I started wearing it, about 5 years ago.My makeup evolved with me as I entered new phases of my life.  As with any woman or person who chooses to wear makeup, I personally feel like there’s always an explanation beyond just wanting to look pretty.

Preteens:

I couldn’t officially wear makeup until I was 13,so for the first year of middle school until that day, I would try and get around this rule. Being the “rebellious” person I am, I would steal my mom’s eyeliner pencils, put it on at school and take it off before she got home from work.I got caught almost every time so it was a pretty ridiculous idea. I only did this on special occasions though. I honestly recall myself saying “a bold eye would look so good with this top” on more than one occasion. Makeup back then was more about saying “Hey world, look at me.I’m not a kid anymore”and less about actual skills or techniques. I just wanted some makeup on my face, I didn’t care what it looked like. It was about being noticed and being seen and recognized for the mature person I was now becoming. Laugh out loud.

Early Teens:

At the age of 14, my eighth grade year and final stage before high school, I went way too far with makeup, all in the name of experimentation.Discovering Sephora and Ulta was the worst thing that could have happened at that time. Not only for my face, which was beginning to feel the effects of puberty, but my wallet, which was almost always empty or filled with candy or something.

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here’s an actual photo of me from 2011 being everything that was wrong with the year 2011

Bright pastel colors, foundation that was either too dark or too light for me or eyeliner that was too dramatic. Back then, I thought I was cool as hell, but looking back I cannot understand why my friends never pulled me aside to tell me to calm it down. Maybe because we were all doing it together. I remember sitting in language arts class one day, while a friend did my eye shadow. She did a purple, glittery smokey eye thing that I hated and in order to fix it, I wiped it off and because the glitter wouldn’t leave all the way, put a very purple color all over my lids and my crease and brow bone to make sure all traces of it were gone. I proceeded to walk around school all day, with two huge clouds of powder hovering over my eyes.

Mid Teens

After combating acne for years that was definitely a result of my terrible face washing habits and my overuse of makeup, I found a more sound routine. I spent most of this time, again probably wearing too much but no longer to the point where it was comical.

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Me almost every morning because something was always going wrong.

I think this stage was probably of combination of both wanting to experiment and look more mature. If my early teens were about experimenting with colors, then my mid teens were about experimenting with different products and brands.The bold eyebrow thing was now coming back and I was blessed in the thick eyebrow department since birth, so that wasn’t a problem. I was perfecting my cat-eye and let me tell you, 16-year-old me per-fec-ted it(insert snaps for dramatic effect).

Late Teens:

So at 18, I’m still technically in this bracket so things can change. But while the first half was mainly about having a “beat” face(see twitter for more information), I’ve kind of segued into that “no makeup-makeup” look. Don’t get me wrong, I love lipsticks and lashes(my lipstick collection grew exponentially over the past year). Makeup for me now is more about not looking like a corpse when I go out, or making my little lashes actually appear. I don’t wear liquid eyeliner as much as I used to, or ever really.I stopped wearing eyeliner on my water line years ago because of how old it made me look,I know, ironic right? And I really miss my cat eye’s, but instead of using my time putting on makeup, researching or shopping for a bunch of new products or brands I can write or read or do 100 other things I like doing. I don’t even wear foundation anymore.Instead I opt for concealer(only where I really need it) and a light,loose powder on top. I think the explanation now isn’t why I wear makeup but rather why I wear so much less than I used to. I believe it’s mainly because after starting on my transition from high school student to college and adult life and taking stock on things that are really matter to me, spending an hour every morning putting a bunch of things on my face is no longer one of them.

Don’t get me wrong, I still love it and I feel like wearing makeup has been such a staple part of my personality for so long that I can never really see myself never wearing any.  I feel as if I’m  pushing it to the back burner and forcing people to notice other aspects of who I am before examining and scrutinizing the amount of makeup I have on my face.

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